Rome,27 B.C. :- Young scribe Marcus falls for new neighbour Cynthia, a Briton, and to impress her asks lazy slave Grumio to clean the dog poo from her door-step. Marcus's sex-mad colleague and house-mate Stylax is anxious for them to respond to an invitation to an orgy so Marcus invites Cynthia, trusting she will not know what it will be like. Grumio however accidentally lets slip to Metella, Cynthia's sarcastic slave, the nature of the gathering whilst Stylax is forced by his boss, Flavia, to attend. Thus Stylax ends up cage-fighting whilst Marcus must watch his landlord escort Cynthia to the orgy. Written by don @ minifie-1

The boys are introduced to Cynthia's new boyfriend Cassius, a friendly local gladiator. Everyone's charmed apart from Marcus who hopes that, one way or another, their relationship will be short-lived. Stylax plays a prank on Aurelius which gets out of hand. Written by Plebs

Stylax buys Grumio an erotic vase for his birthday featuring a character who bears a striking resemblance to someone nearby. Marcus has done nothing for his slave and, under pressure from the girls, suggests they swap roles for the day. Stylax hangs out with his cousin Lucretia, with whom he has an unusually close relationship. Written by Plebs

Marcus is unhappy when Felix,part of a stray cat infestation,wanders into the apartment but when he learns Cynthia has adopted the cat sets out to pamper him,sadly overdoing it so the cat dies. Stylax meanwhile finds he has herpes and goes to the STD clinic where he falls for nurse Beatrix,though his promiscuity puts her off him. Learning that Stylax and Felix used the same scratching post Cynthia accuses Stylax of killing her cat by giving him herpes whilst Grumio's belief that he has the winning lottery ticket comes to nothing. Written by don @ minifie-1

Marcus is depressed after being beaten up by an elderly chugger and even less pleased when the landlord billets a pair of Thracian immigrants,Irina and Cosmo,in the apartment. The pair keep the others awake at night with their noisy sex but on the plus side introduce Romans to the wonders of the banana. After another encounter with the veteran Marcus returns to find the Thracians have invited all their friends to a noisy party though Grumio takes advantage of a coincidence to get rid of them. Written by don @ minifie-1

A soothsayer predicts a misfortune for Cynthia,making her reluctant to attend the festival of Saturnalia in case something happens to her. Marcus,hoping to use the festival to make his move on Cynthia,tries to bribe the soothsayer but she claims the future is irreversible. Following a domestic mishap Cynthia agrees to go after all but Stylax and Marcus have been roped into waiting at Flavia's Saturnalia party and take drastic action to leave. Meanwhile Grumio has a close call with a zealous priest who wants to ship him off to Cyprus as a castrati. Written by don @ minifie-1