They don't remember they saw each-other on the San Francisco subway when their totally different parents kept them apart, so they think it's love at first sight when federal prosecution official Gregory 'Greg' Montgomery can't think of anything else then Dharma Finklestein after seeing her on it again, and she recognizes his picture in the newspaper and finds him in his office, to drag him along to the Giants baseball stadium for the organ music and shouting with impunity and next for pie- all the way to Reno, where they get married the same day. Back home, the dream soon turns nightmarish after meeting her hippie parents: her dad Larry may not know they committed the 'fascist state's unnatural' marriage- while his are socialite snobs; so the lovers have a bad row over decency or staying yourself ruthlessly honest... Written by KGF Vissers

After making Greg drag the mattress to the roof 'for the full moon' and making love instead of sleeping when it starts raining, Dharma insists to invite both their parents to celebrate their marriage. Kitty would stop or at least boycott it, but when Dharma turns up at the county-club must save face by taking over so as to hold it in style. In order to get Dharma's parents aboard, hippie versus conservative concessions are 'traded', in a messy battle for symbols of incompatible values... Written by KGF Vissers

Hippie-child Dharma doesn't even notice well-mannered Greg's embarrassment to be seen naked by her date Brian -she forgot to cancel, having met him a day before her marriage- in bed and by wicked weird Jane while bathing: she only hears he prefers a shower, so the goof girls decide to surprise him with one; over the phone, Kitty thinks Dharma means a baby-shower... Greg tried to get the fathers closer golfing at the country club, but that's only closer to physical abuse working up trough verbal, or even crazier... Kitty shows Dharma the wealthy way to make Gregory comfortable, a classy luxury flat irresistible even to the hippie floozies, but meanwhile Pete helped him to install a shower in her flat... Written by KGF Vissers

After Greg gives Dharma a diamond ring to announce their 'second wedding', arranged in traditional style by Kitty, they expected their parents to clash over traditions, but actually they rather fight among each-other. After Edward told Larry he's a whipped husband except for a formal marriage, the hippie 'rebels' against her extreme vegetarianism and nature rites; Kitty is fed-up her tireless hostess skills aren't appreciated, not even noticed -nor her eye-color- and actually claims to want a divorce. Bridesmaid from hell Jane meanwhile makes loveless love with best man Pete... Written by KGF Vissers

Dharma insists to invite Greg's former legal colleague Barbara to join them in a restaurant, but once she realizes they were lovers for two years till he let her take a promotion in Washington, Dharma is jealous enough to start prospecting alternative lovers for Barbara... The wedding video may barely escape Larry's suspicion of government spying (unlike the TV set), it holds surprising proof deciding his cards dispute with 'working class exploiting capitalist' Edward, while an allergy remedy Abby offers Kitty is ignored, until she learns about its wrinkle-curing 'side-effect'... Written by KGF Vissers

Seeing eager beaver Greg is always stressed, Dharma gets him to take her yoga class, which is hell on his untrained muscles anyway, just too much after competing with Pete makes them strain a groin viz. ham-strings. Now Dharma has limping Greg try 'do nothing' at home- in his Streber eyes literally a dog's life. Meanwhile Dharma goes hold the fort at the office, but gets phone calls mixed up with dangerous consequences... Jealous of his own rich brother, Larry seeks to make Edward his investor, somehow cashing in on the female love for yoga. Kitty plans a birthday party for her maid Luddy, a gifts dilemma for everyone, but Dharma's... Written by KGF Vissers

Greg is most suspicious when an old Indian they never met turns up on their roof saying he needs to spend his last few days there to die in his tribe's traditional way, but Dharma is as determined to help George Littlefox with his last wishes as Larry is to apologize for the injustice inflicted by- well, other white people then his (Baltic), but anyway, and as Abby to demonstrate her irrelevant Peiute knowledge. Edward is made to sacrifice his priceless bear-rug as shroud. Kitty is getting so desperate to find a speaker at the botanical gardens even an Indian will do. Pete is eager to go with or for Greg to a dinner with the US attorney general... Written by KGF Vissers

After Greg wins a high-profile criminal case, dad Ed brings in political adviser Andy: it's time to pursue his life-long dream, a bid for Congress. Dharma accepts a politician's wife needs to learn appropriate behavior from an expert: Kitty! To Greg's delight none of the three Finkelsteins causes any embarrassment when he officially announces his candidature, but the press only has eyes for- Greg's open fly, and when he has comfort-sex with Dharma in the car, a paparazzo shoots them with his pants down. The effect on public opinion is however surprisingly positive, and yet... Written by KGF Vissers

When Greg and his family must pass a 'standard' FBI security check, not Dharma's past surprises, but their parents. Dharma tells her dad Larry to run as he once broke into a federal building to burn records, but when Pete checks things, he finds Larry only damaged a carpet, the revolutionary's record is squeaky clean. Abby realizes the 'innocent' truth would totally destroy Larry's self-esteem, so she and Dharma convince Greg to help them execute a ludicrous plan... On the other hand, pillar of society Edward is found to be- a bigamist, but Kitty sees a romantic side to being 'the other woman', just the zest their long sex-less relationship needs... Written by KGF Vissers

The Finkelstein Thanksgiving is fasting instead of a turkey dinner; this year they take the next step: liberating turkeys from 'culinary death-row', but run over the only one who actually made it outside the pen. Kitty's tradition is giving the staff off and dining at a restaurant, but this year Dharma insists to cook for the whole family, actually with Jane, who picks up Pete shopping at the supermarket for him and his new cat. Based solely on Dharma's nesting, she and her gang assume her to be pregnant, only Greg is not to be told... Written by KGF Vissers

Dharma feels terrible, being a failure as a yoga instructor. Now everyone -except her parents, who never pay anyhow- have deserted her class for Spyder's self-defense class. Only Jane understands Dharma's sniffling and whining, but it's Greg who consoles her by behaving inappropriately funny at his parent's fund-raiser recital for the San Francisco Opera. Now Dharma gathers the courage to confront her martial arts rival, who proves dishonest and mean enough to spark a cat-fight with the hippie pacifist... Written by KGF Vissers

While the Finkelsteins' hippie tribe carols, Kitty hates having Greg's 16 year-old cousin Jennifer's staying there during her ma's honeymoon, so she convinces Dharma the girl is better off with a younger couple. When they catch Jen kissing with some youngster, Greg throws Frank out, but Dharma resists punishing as 'giving in by negative attention', they settle on sending her along when Dharma and Jane do Christmas shopping as daft German tourists. After being arrested for a sweater Jen stole but blamed the weirdos for, Dharma is converted to disciplining, but grounding proves far from easy in practice... Written by KGF Vissers

After winning a major court case and celebrating at the office, Greg admits to Dharma his stressy job makes him unhappy, so she convinces him to resign on the spot. After a single party night, she finds Greg up making an elaborate breakfast and miserable without somewhere to 'wear his work underwear', so she convinces him to practice cooking, which he obviously enjoys, as his professional calling, even if he must start as fry-cook in a measly hamburger joint which even Pete considers beneath a lawyer. The Montgomery parents's efforts to get Greg an even better lawyer job aren't appreciated, in fact Edward is made to consider his own menial talent, hair styles, but soon... Written by KGF Vissers

Because Greg's compulsive neatness clashes with Dharma's free spirit car care, they decide to buy her one; a traumatic experience for the 'lying' car salesman Greg was getting a good deal from, instead she goes to an auction with Jane, and returns with- a yellow school-bus, to Greg's legally justified horror like giving -uninsured- free rides to people. Abby cooks a roast for the Montgmery's first formal visit, when Kitty discovers Abby got an original from Salazar, the sculptor whose latest exhibition her foundation hosts an opening for. At the reception, it becomes clear Salazar was Abby's fiancé, but the rain causes more urgent worries by flooding the parking lot via Salazar's giant cone outdoors, 'Old Yeller' is the only hope to evacuate the art lovers... Written by KGF Vissers

As if Dharma's alternative medicine didn't make sick Greg miserable enough, she gets a surprise visit from her hunky ex Leonard, who took a vow of celibacy and started Buddhist wandering after their break-up, and she asks him to stay with them. Leonard has many talents and is instantly popular with everyone, even the Montgomerys take him in, while Dharma wants a few weeks of marital abstention. Only when she sees Greg is desperately unhappy, she agrees to stop seeing Leonard, but he has a surprise for Greg and Pete... Written by KGF Vissers

Once they sneak by their dogs, Greg can take Dharma for their first Valentine's Day weekend outing, a BandB he booked. Greg endures a stressful drive, during which Dharma litters, plays childish car spotting games, and makes him bury roadkill. To top it off, they are arrested and booked during the romantic sunset they had hoped to enjoy together. Greg is unhappy when the BandB isn't nearly as romantic as made out on the website, but Dharma takes a liking to the dump's owners, Alice Binns and her measly adult son Kenny. Meanwhile a bad phone connection makes Kitty and Edward fear that the animal benefit junk swap the Finkelstein invite them to is a actually sordid wife swapping swingers affair. Written by KGF Vissers

During the Winter Olympics, everything in Greg and Dharma's home is somehow linked to the Games, their official sponsors etc., including a drinking game which gets Greg, Larry -who needs somewhere to eat, Abby doesn't cook- and Edward -who flees the home where Kitty got invited to a Seniors organization on turning 50- drunk at the rate of showings of the Olympic flame, far faster then expected, till they believe their own bragging and fly to Lake Tahoe, barely able to remember they came to prove they can bobsled, for some reason from a mountain slope in a canoe... Meanwhile Dharma, Abby and wicked Jane try to convince vain Kitty life gets better from 50, and not to have plastic surgery, but the only way to cure her depression is the game to go to an officers bar, dressed as man-eaters.... Written by KGF Vissers

When the water is cut off at Greg and Dharma's place, they stay with his parents, to uninterested Kitty's obvious suspicion, while maid Celia is pretty lazy. Greg's room is the deal place to discuss their romantic past and seductive moves. Then Abby arrives in tears, because Larry still considers marriage a mindless convention, she wants open commitment after 28 years, and Dharma decides this requires a family meeting, with the Montgomerys. It gets even worse at night, when Dharma keeps the telephone line open in Greg's bedroom for Abby, Kitty sees Larry wandering around starkers and Greg in bed with Dharma. Edward's moving out after a de facto separation from Kitty is becoming hard to hide. Written by KGF Vissers

When Dharma discovers the Montgomerys are living apart, Kitty convinces her to promise to keep the 'cooling off period' secret for Greg. Having to lie, especially to Greg, thus forced to make Jane Seymour play along in her deception (all the way over in LA!), is bad enough, but when Greg says he 'trusts her judgment' if Dharma has a good reason for keeping a secret from him, which obviously works both ways, the fear he hides things for her too rekindles her pixie sticks-addiction and spoils her six months anniversary fun when she searches his things... Written by KGF Vissers

Dharma accepts to mind Jane's even crazier 'cat' Mr. Boots, a lunatic wearing withe socks and mittens who behaves as feline as a fat human can. However Greg is far more troubled when Dharma doctors the fortune cookies at a double date-dinner in a Chinese restaurant to tell him his parents are separated. Now the proverbial cat is out of the bag, Kitty sucks up to Dharma and Edward tries with Greg, whose remark puts dad on the path to try professional 'young flesh'... Written by KGF Vissers

Like all San Francisco Greg loves the nude-danced ode to Spring, until he realizes it's performed on live TV by Dharma. In Kitty's socialite circles the season starts with a formal feast; when told the ballroom dancing contest requires years of practice, Dharma insists to enter just for fun, which practicing with sweet Greg is, but to Larry's utter horror she turns competitive, encouraged by ma Abby who once was a teenage dancing talent, to the point of contemplating cheating and stunting on stage... Written by KGF Vissers

Greg discovers why Dharma is so eager to 'do it' with him in weird, dangerous, public places: it's a contest with Jane, the winner is awarded the duck (actually a goose), just one of many silly rules. Still Greg decides to help her win the duck back when told doing it with a dull guy like him was worth a bonus. They get arrested, but are released without bail by cop Mel, an old friend of the Finkelsteins. Greg reasons the safest time is during the last episode of Seinfeld, when all San Francisco will be watching inside. However enlisting Pete to give instructions by walkie-talkie is just the lead Jane needs, and she first tricks the Montgomerys to come to the steps of the courthouse... Written by KGF Vissers

Greg's poker bunch has been playing happily for years without any serious personal conversation ever, but Dharma quickly finds out about their private lives and feelings, even becomes their confident for problems and secrets, such as the mystery man's name Paul Binyan, Stuart's job loss and hunk Howard's crush on Greg, who feels she has thus ruined his poker friends, with whom he could relax anonymously... Meanwile Kitty and Edward are so desperate to get rid of ducks who invaded their swimming pool that they appeal to Abby's Berkely degree in bird behavior, yet Larry's primitive idea does the trick... Written by KGF Vissers